Our sweet boy turns two today. I still sneak into his room every single night to watch him sleep. I stroke his soft hair and pudgy cheeks, and even though it’s been two years, I can still hardly believe he’s here. Sometimes I wonder if the novelty will ever wear off, but then I remember that after 16 years, sometimes I still look over at Ben when he’s asleep, and can’t believe I get to be married to him, so maybe there’s just something magical/creepy about watching someone when they’re sleeping.
I’m not a huge fan of the Robert Munsch book “I’ll Love You Forever”, but I like to joke with Anika about how I’ll totally be the mom who drives over to her son’s house when he’s a grown man, climbs up a ladder and through the bedroom window to watch him while he sleeps. But I draw the line at holding him in my lap and singing lullabies.
I watch him sleep and think about how I used to be terrified we’d have a boy someday. I was so relieved when we had two girls, because I didn’t have a clue what to do with a son. I don’t have any brothers, and although I think Ben’s very nice, I didn’t know him when he was younger, so little boys were kind of foreign to me.
But God started to change something in me a few years ago – it happened very gradually, but I’d get these sudden little flashes in my mind of what it might be like to have a little boy, and this desire started to grow in me.
Then one day, I was wiping our table after supper, and as I was leaning over to swipe up some leftover food, this sudden, clear picture came to my mind, and it was so real, it took my breath away. I saw our family, with our two girls, and a little boy. At that point, there was still no hope that we could ever have another baby, but I filed it away in my mind, and I wondered. I didn’t know if it was from God, or just my imagination, but it came completely out of nowhere, and it felt so very strong and meaningful. But I didn’t know what to do with it, so I waited.
And then all kinds of craziness happened, and God made it possible for us to have our miracle baby. From the very beginning, I felt like we were having a boy, and I was completely delighted to find out it was true. There has not been one single second when I have ever wanted it any other way, and I am so incredibly glad God prepared me for the beautiful blessing of Everett. But really, he needed no preparation – he’s so sweet, I would have fallen in love with him right from the very beginning, anyway!
He is full of energy and smiles and goofiness. He makes us laugh all the time, and there is such a lightness and joy about him. He’s going through the usual toddler trials of learning boundaries and all that, but he really is just completely wonderful. He completes our family in the most perfect way, and I am thankful beyond words that we are able to celebrate his little life today.
Donald Chump (who apparently lives in our backyard….Everett goes running to the window and points outside when he says it, not really sure why!)
Soo, Bang (soother and blanket)
Anka, Kaya, Evitt, Gampa, Gamma
Turn! (when he wants to do it himself)
Mommy, you! (when he wants me to come with him)
Kaylia especially is concerned about how to make today special for Everett. She’s built an elaborate fort, and keeps telling Everett he doesn’t need to do a thing – he should lie down and rest, because he’s the birthday boy. Just what a toddler needs, right??!
*photo credit: Morgan Braun