10 Ways to Have a Happier Morning

I love lists, and I love problem-solving.

If something is not working, chances are good that the solution can usually be found with a little bit of brainstorming, and a good list.

I’ve been doing this a lot recently, as I examine our morning routine. A bad morning routine can put everybody in such a bad mood that we’re lucky if we recover by noon.

As we’ve been making changes around here, our mornings have gradually been improving, which means we start off the day with a much happier attitude than we used to.

Here’s what’s been working for us:

1. Take care of the basics.

There is no way that I can stay calm and happy if I am not taking proper care of my body. How I sleep, what I eat, even how much water I drink, can all affect my mood. Praying desperately for some divine intervention and miraculous mothering skills is great and all, but I wonder if God sometimes thinks I should just go to bed earlier.

2. Clean up “Your Spot”.

I read once that everyone has a “spot” – that one spot in your house that makes you feel victorious when it’s clean, and defeated when it’s out of control. I didn’t think I had a spot, but it turns out that I have two: my kitchen sink/counter, and my living room floor.

If I come out first thing in the morning to a mess in those spots, I’m behind before I’ve even begun.

However, if I make sure that they’re cleaned up the night before, I come out in the morning feeling pretty fantastic about my clean house. It could be a mess in other areas, but as long as I have my kitchen counter and my living room floor, I’m good.

I highly recommend finding out what your spot is, and then protecting it like your day depends on it.

3. Get your schedule in writing.

We have a laminated chart on our fridge which Anika loves to check off each morning. I got SOOOO tired of nagging her every morning to get things done, that one day, I got some paper and markers, and I made the most thorough list I could think of. It’s even got “Clean boogers out of nose” on it. Everything that I want her to do each morning is on that list.

We have a separate list for Sundays, because we need to do different things to get out of the house for church on those days.

I still need to remind her at times to stay focused and get stuff done, but I nag a lot less than I used to.

4. Start with some quiet time.

First thing on my own schedule is getting up an hour before the girls (thank goodness they usually sleep until 8 am, I’m totally spoiled!), to spend some time reading my Bible, praying, and exercising.

I used to be very cranky in the mornings because I woke up when they woke up, and had no time to ease into my day. That is a BAD idea for me. I need my time to “wake up slowly”.

5. Pick a verse for the day.

When I’m reading my Bible, I try to pick one verse or thought to keep on my mind throughout the day. Sometimes I memorize it, sometimes I write it out and stick it on the fridge, just to keep it there to come back to again and again.

6. Turn on the music!

I don’t actually like listening to music during the day. Weird, since I love music and I’ve taught piano for years. But my favorite time to listen to it is when I’m driving, and can focus completely on listening to it.

When it’s on as I’m going about my day, I find it distracting and sometimes slightly overwhelming. With homeschooling, and housework, and everything else that demands my attention, I find there’s only so much noise I can take in at once.

However. When it comes to the mind, and learning to “take every thought captive”, music is the best way for me to be continually reminded to get things on track.

Ben’s been turning on the worship music each morning so that I won’t forget, and it makes such a big difference to have it playing. I think I could get used to the “extra noise”!
7. Plan a breakfast menu.

Giving kids a choice for what they want to eat may sound like a good idea, but it’s never worked out well for us. They always want different things, it takes so long for them to make up their minds, and the whole thing kept dragging out so long, that one day, I just quit.

I made up a breakfast menu, stuck it on the fridge, and now the girls know exactly what to expect.

It has completely cut out the complaining about what we’re eating for breakfast. It’s nothing fancy, and we usually stick to eggs, oatmeal, leftover pancakes in the toaster, that kind of thing, but it switches things up a bit, and it saves so much time.

8. Stay away from sugar.

When we were living at camp, I noticed how Anika always crashed hard, mid-morning, after those big, sugary breakfasts that were served at the lodge. It made homeschooling a nightmare, so we decided to experiment, and only allowed her to have sugar on weekends, when she didn’t have to do school.

It made such a huge difference! She eats sugar-free jam or a little bit of honey on her pancakes during the week, and it’s this big treat to get syrup on the weekends. At first, she hated it, but now it’s just normal.

I’ve noticed how it affects me, too. Usually, I have my green smoothie for breakfast, but every once in a while, when the pancakes are fresh, I’ll grab one.

And oh, my goodness – it makes me feel completely different. I cannot believe the difference in my mood. I don’t do well with carbs, especially first thing in the morning, and I find myself extremely irritable after eating anything like that.

9. Stay calm.

My movement therapist once explained to me that a muscle at rest is ready to move in any direction, at any moment. A tense muscle, on the other hand, has to relax first, before being ready to move in the new direction.

I find it’s the same with moods. When I’m relaxed and calm, and something unexpected comes up, it’s far easier to go with the flow.

But it I’m rushing around, we’re running late, my morning’s frantic and crazy, it’s only going to get crazier. I’m too tense, not ready and available to move in the direction I need to go. I’m trying to remember to take a few deep breaths, and calm down.

10. Be flexible.

I can make all the lists I want to stick on our fridge, but I cannot guarantee a perfect morning, every morning. Life happens. And that’s good – it’s the way it should be.

I need to be ready to ditch the lists, when necessary.

And maybe not every morning will be perfect, but lots of mornings are pretty good.

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I’m trying to begin each day with this verse on my mind:

This is the day that the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it.

How can I be glad in it?

What can I do to help things run more smoothly for my family?

In what ways do I need to become more disciplined so that I can be the wife and mom I need to be?

It’s a work in progress!

Any tips you’ve come up with over the years? I’d love to hear them!

(If you want some extra reading, Micheal Hyatt wrote a great post called How to Become A Morning Person. His first point is quite brilliant.)

Finally Accepting One Thousand Gifts

So there’s this little book on the New York Time’s Bestseller List…. Maybe you’ve heard of it?

Actually, it’s huge. It seems to have taken over almost every Christian woman’s blog out there. I bump into it everywhere I go on the internet.

I really wanted to read the book. I was very drawn to the idea of it – recognizing God’s gifts in everyday life and keeping a list. And I love Ann Voskamp’s blog. Plus, the cover looks so pretty. And I love books. I was totally going to read it….someday. I just wasn’t sure when I would get around to it.

But then, a few things happened.

First of all, I read this post by Ann Voskamp.

The two big lessons God has been teaching me in the last year have been choosing to control my attitude and emotions, and getting rid of the habit of worry and fear. When I read that listing your blessings has been scientifically proven to eliminate worry, and increase joy, I decided I needed to start my list of daily gifts from God ASAP, even though I hadn’t read the book.

And then, when I arrived at my parents’ house here in the Florida, there lay One Thousand Gifts on my mom’s desk. I’ve been reading it in snatches here and there, trying to finish it before it’s time to go home. Two chapters left! And my life may never be the same.

So dramatic, hey? But seriously. It’s so good.

Why could this be life-changing?

Well, I love the idea of eliminating the worry and increasing the joy in my life by making a habit of thankfulness. Listing our blessings is a spiritual discipline, and it draws us closer to God. It opens our eyes to all that He is doing, every moment of the day.

Ann Voskamp quotes:

Gratitude bestows reverence, allowing us to encounter everyday epiphanies, those transcendent moments of awe that change forever how we experience life and the world. (Sarah Ban Breathnach, p. 42)

Reverence sounds good. So do everyday epiphanies. I’ll take some of those, please.

But even more than that, I have connected with the idea that when we practice thankfulness in the small things, and practice joy in the easier moments, we are strengthening our ability to thank God in the hard times, as well.

Start small, and an attitude of thankfulness, trust, and worship will grow, until we can accept anything life sends our way with faith and peace, knowing that God is in everything.

I had never considered that something as simple as making a list would help me trust God more. It seems too easy to grab a pen and paper, and have that become the answer to so many of the problems I’ve struggled with my whole life.

And yet, Ann writes,

Do not disdain the small. The whole of the life – even the hard – is made up of the minute parts, and if I miss the infinitesimals, I miss the whole. These are new language lessons, and I live them out. There is a way to live the big of giving thanks in all things. It is this: to give thanks in this one small thing. The moments will add up.(p. 57)

When I go through a time of crisis, I keep looking at the big picture. I fill my mind with thoughts of how I will never be able to make it, and it is much too hard to bear, etc, etc.

Who could possibly learn thankfulness and joy with that kind of mindset? 

But when you break it down into very small, manageable chunks, and surrender each chunk to God, then in that little moment, anything is possible.

So…if you want in on all the wonderful benefits of listing one thousand gifts, you could just start right now, and skip the book, but really, the book is making all the difference for me. Ann Voskamp’s list keeps going long, long after 1,000, and she’s still going strong. She’s like the thankfulness expert. I am loving the glimpse at the way she thinks, and how she searches out joy each day.

I want to search out joy each day. I want to notice the little things, and train my eye to see God in it all.

So inspired, love the book, and excited to see where this is all going to go.

What about you? Have you read it? Do you make a list?

Give Every Day

There’s this great blog that I’ve been reading called “Give Every Day”. It’s about this family that sold all their stuff, and have headed out on the road in an RV to travel North America for a year and spend every day giving of themselves to people they don’t know. They volunteer at all kinds of cool places, and are constantly on the lookout for unique ways to give. It’s not like all their ideas are earth-shatteringly original or complicated. Sometimes it’s just super-simple stuff.

But the thing is that they’re doing it every single day. And the post I read today was about how there’s no way you can do that without being really intentional. They’ve made a list of ideas. I think I want a list of ideas.

Sure, I do things for Ben and the girls every single day, but I definitely do not do things for people I don’t know, every single day. That would be a lot harder when you don’t live in an RV and you’re not driving all over the States. But I’m curious what kind of a list Ben and I could come up with….