Keeping my thoughts under control is the biggest struggle of my life. By far.
It’s such a slippery thing, because I can be going about my day, appearing for all the world as though I’m a completely normal person, capably living life, and yet inside I can be following thought patterns that are rapidly spiraling out of control.
For me, it’s worry and anxiety that have held me captive for many, many years.
Sheesh, that sounds dramatic. And yet recently, as God has been convicting, teaching, and enlightening me over the last few months, I’m thinking that words like “captive” are pretty accurate. I keep begging for freedom.
There are a few reasons why I have felt it is absolutely necessary for me to develop a healthier thought life:
1. Worry is sin. It doesn’t seem as sinful as some of the other things I could be doing, but I’ve been seeing that it is just as destructive for my life.
2. Worry is the root of most of my health issues. I’ve been told that the stomach holds the stress. I don’t have any kind of series illness, I just have a lot of issues with digestion, as well as tension throughout my body that is inhibiting me from function in a normal, relaxed way.
3. Worry is holding me back from where I want to be in my life. I want to be in a place of trust. I want my prayer life to grow. I want to be growing by leaps and bounds in my relationship with God. I want to be fully present in my life as a wife and mom. I want to be relaxed and happy.
I used to think that I would easily be able to stop worrying once my problems went away. I had legitimate reasons for feeling worried and anxious. Surely anyone would feel anxious if they found themselves dealing with the stuff I was dealing with.
Uh, hello. My life will never be free of problems. It would be much easier to deal with those same problems if I wasn’t mentally freaking out all the time. I make my problems about twenty times bigger than they actually are.
Absence of worry does not equal absence of problems. It just means absence of worrying. I will stop worrying when I stop worrying, not when I stop having problems.
Because if worrying is a sin, and Jesus commands us not to do it, that would mean that we are fully equipped to stop doing it RIGHT NOW.
Yes, please. I would like some of that.
How do you get it?
Which brings us to the fantastic book I promised to tell you about.
It is presently changing my life. That also sounds dramatic, but it’s true.
It’s called “Loving God With All Your Mind”, by Elizabeth George.
My sister gave it to me awhile back, and I started reading it, but I usually have about five books on the go, which means I don’t get anywhere fast. My goal is to finish one fantastic book before I delve into another one. After I finished “So Long, Insecurity”, by Beth Moore, it was time for Elizabeth George’s book to get a little love.
Oh, my word. If you struggle with worry, go get that book.
Funny thing is, my first impression was, “This is kind of basic. I know this stuff already.”
But I don’t. If I did, I wouldn’t be worrying about everything from morning until night.
It’s time for that to stop. I’m feeling motivated, convicted, challenged and inspired. So off we go.
It’s hard work. There’s a reason why they say, “Old habits die hard.” Yes, they do.
But I’m ready to dig in. And I’ll tell you all about it next time!
Right now I have an old habit to kill… And a fantastic book to read!