I came home last night, flopped down on the couch and cried.
Actually, I didn’t just cry – I sat there and wailed to Ben about all the things that are frustrating me right now. And everything that frustrates me right now has to do with Tuesdays!
Tuesday is the day that we go into the city every week. Ben’s parents’ neighbors joke that they always know it’s Tuesday when they see the grandchildren playing in the back yard.
Spending time with family on a regular is one of the good things about Tuesdays. So is four hours of time talking with Ben while we drive.
But seriously? The errands and appointments and hours spent in the van is just wearing me down.
Most of the time I try to have a good attitude. I try not to feel sorry for myself. I try to find creative ways to make running errands look attractive for my “picture a day” project that I’m working on. But really, how many ways can you photograph “running errands in the city”?
Here’s some of my collection:
I’m trying to do my best.
But in all honesty, on some days, I feel like it’s all more than I can handle.
Yesterday was one of those days.
And Ben patiently listened, and said a few encouraging words, but wisely realized that there wasn’t much to be said. He made me tea, and turned on an episode of Heartland for me to watch while he cleaned up all the groceries.
(I really love him. Not just because he does stuff for me, but that’s very nice, too!)
And I calmed down, and was able to get all the emotions under control again.
So the point of all that? Not to whine or to try to make you all feel sorry for me.
It’s more of an effort to be real. I can post a million pictures of a perfect-looking life, and gorgeous scenery, and make camp life sound all upbeat, outdoorsy, natural, rugged, and on the front lines of ministry. Some days I love living in a place where a ton of people wish they could live. And other days I flop on my couch and bawl because there’s stuff that’s just plain hard about it for me.
You could say that the moral to my story has to do with how important it is to keep a good attitude. Or you could say that it’s “a little bit of tea and Heartland goes a long way.”
Or you could quote my dad, the farmer, who wisely says, “Don’t think about the crops when it’s raining!” That’s one of our favorite sayings around here. I’ll pick that one to be the moral!
Last night, it was definitely “raining on my crops” and I needed to think about something else for a little while….